


Kittens

by drainbamage954 (cats_cradle6766)



Series: How To Pet [4]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Cats, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-01
Updated: 2014-10-01
Packaged: 2018-03-23 00:56:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3749050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cats_cradle6766/pseuds/drainbamage954
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, Chen is irrational about what he wants in a very demanding way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kittens

**Author's Note:**

> A continuation of the How to Pet storyline, originally written between 2013 ~ 2014. A small snippet piece taken and written as a gift for Bunny~

Lu Han, not for the first time, is having problems with Chen. Mostly in that Chen is in his lap (normal), whining (also normal), pawing at him (extremely normal), and occasionally hitting him (unfortunately normal) while loudly demanding that they have kittens.

"I think there is something extremely wrong with this," Lu Han tells him, grabbing Chen's hands firmly in his own and pressing his lips to a thin line. Chen is doing that _thing_ where he wiggles his hips and seeing as he's in Lu Han's lap, this is compromising when they clearly need to have a rational, logical, not sexual conversation.

"No, there isn't." Chen does that stern face thing. "I see nothing wrong with having kittens. Lu Han please," he whines, high in the back of his throat and rolls forward. "Lu Han, I want kittens, please. They're so cute and we could have a family!"

Nope. Lu Han is prepared for a lot of things. He woke up with his roommates cat as a human on his face naked and survived so he figures he's got some pretty thick skin, but being whined at to have 'kittens' with his lover thing is a bit too much.

"We can't have kittens." Fact. 

"Why not?" Chen is looking at him as if ‘having kittens’ is a perfectly reasonable thing and Lu Han is just being mean. 

"Chen-"

"I thought I was _Jongdae_ now, seeing as I'm so human." Lu Han hates when they play this game. 

"Chen," Lu Han repeats as he tightens his grip around Chen's wrists, trying to look serious even as Chen writhes in his grip. "We can't have kittens because it doesn't work like that." Chen raises one of his eyebrows and Lu Han hates that Sehun taught him how to do that. 

"Sure, it does," Chen says and Lu Han wants to scream. "We just mate and-"

"We have been mating!" Lu Han kind of yells. "For how long?!" Chen blinks. "A Long time!" _Breathe_. "I think we would have had kittens by now if we _could_."

"Maybe we just need to try harder," Chen replies almost immediately and Lu Han, frustrated, drops his head, pressing his face into Chen's chest and groans loudly at him. This is a horrible battle to fight. "Maybe we just need to have sex more."

"We have sex almost daily."

"Right," Chen says far too brightly. "So we just have to have more." 

Now his hips are rolling again, clearly with serious intent. And he's biting Lu Han's ear gently. God Damnit. "Chen, we can't have kittens. We're both male."

"But I turned into a human," Chen purrs into Lu Han's ear huskily. "Maybe it'll be another miracle." Lu Han sighs. The least he will get out of this is a ton of sex, which, in truth, is not an unfortunate thing. "And we can have our own litter of kittens." 

Lu Han sighs as his grip loosens around Chen's wrists and allows Chen to push him back against the couch, the low purr in his throat and teeth nipping down his neck as his fingers dance down to Lu Han's jeans. "I'm telling you," Lu Han says even as Chen presses fast short kisses to his mouth and tugs his pants open. Lu Han returns the favor, earning a low approving sound. "We can't actually have kittens."

"We can try," Chen grins into his mouth as he maneuvers himself to be rid of the 'horrible pant things' that he still hates wearing. He eases himself snugly against Lu Han's front and rolls his hips forward, already growing hard and lets out soft needy sounds at the back of his throat.

Lu Han could feel guilty when slides his fingers into him, stretching him easily rising Chen up to sink down onto his cock, reveling in the high moan and Chen's head thrown back as his fingers dig into Lu Han's shoulders. He could feel bad they break the 'no sex on common spaces' rule for the nth time as Chen elects to fuck himself down onto Lu Han enthusiastically. He could feel guilty because Chen isn't going to have kittens but instead he just feels sated and content when Chen comes with Lu Han inside of him and his own hand around his cock, letting out a stuttered gasping breath into Lu Han's mouth. It’s hard not to feel content when Chen kisses him again before slumping onto him and panting heavily, Lu Han's hands gently petting over his hips soothingly.

Sehun finds them and promises not to tell Junmyeon. Chen tells Lu Han he approves of him and bites Lu Han's shoulder.

The topic drops until two days later when it's Chen's turn to get groceries, meaning it's Lu Han's turn and they walk by a woman pushing a stroller and Chen says "I don't get why you humans only have one kitten at a time. Are you all defective?" and Lu Han nearly hits himself in the face. Luckily, he doesn’t, still holding the groceries can calculating that disaster before it happens. "The fuck?"

"I mean," Chen is looking superior. "We have litters of like 4~9 kittens." He blinks at Lu Han, chewing his lip before saying, "What about thirteen?"

"Thirteen what?"

"Kittens."

" _What?_ "

"For us."

"No."

"But-"

"We can't have kittens!" Lu Han yells hoarsely and Chen looks entirely too put out.

"I just want kittens!"

"We’re male!" Lu Han never wanted this. He never even wanted kids, let alone kitten kids. "Name one time two men had a baby."

"I don't want a baby though," Chen says and Lu Han is confused. "I want kittens. They're different." Lu Han sometimes hates his lover. "Please, give me kittens."

"No," Lu Han is determined.

"I want to have kittens with you."

"We can't have kittens, Chen!"

Chen locks him out of their bedroom and Lu Han wakes up to Chen sitting on his stomach and looking moody. "What?" is the first thing thrown out of Lu Han's mouth.

"I'm hungry," Chen states primly before flopping onto Lu Han and whining. "Give me food."

"You learned how to make your own food," Lu Han moans, trying to roll over to get more sleep but Chen just wriggles further on top of him and bites his shoulder. He moans again to show his annoyance at the other. "Go make me food, you stole my bed last night."

"Our bed," Chen corrects as he snuggles on top of Lu Han and nuzzles against his hair. "It's our bed now. And you know what we should do?"

"Eat breakfast," Lu Han suggests into the sofa. 

"That," Chen agrees. "And then go back to bed and mate." Even after over a year of being a human, Chen still insists on using his previous vocabulary. He's done pretty well dealing with being a human completely, being 'Kim Jongdae' and working as a server/cashier for the local coffee shop that is pretty cool with him using unconventional language. Sometimes it causes problems but Lu Han's learned to accept it just as Chen being, well, Chen.

"You're still on this kittens thing, aren't you," Lu Han grumbles into the upholstery. "We can't have kittens."

"Maybe I just want you," Chen hums instead, hands sliding pleasantly over Lu Han. "You're a very nice mate, after all." Lu Han mrrrs at the couch as Chen nips and bites over his jaw, finger nails pleasantly dragging under his shirt and over his skin.

With a sigh, Lu Han is rolling over, pinning Chen under him and getting that curved smile directed up at him as Chen rolls under him enticingly. "Breakfast," Lu Han tells him firmly to which he nods and then hums gently when Lu Han kisses him slowly. "Then we'll see." Chen frowns at him in annoyance. "If you're good."

"I'm always good," Chen protests as Lu Han pushes himself up and from the couch, stretching with a groan.

"You locked me out last night," Lu Han reminds him as he saunters to the kitchen.

"You deny me my kittens," Chen throws back at him, following him and wrapping around his back and Lu Han sets about making eggs.

"We can't have kittens." Old conversation is old. "We are not going to have kittens." Chen bites him on the shoulder and pinches his hip. Lu Han shoves him off and looks at him pointedly. Chen picks up the toaster. Lu Han sighs. "Look, the way that humans work, and you're a human Chen, is that two male humans don't have another human. They don't do the whole babies thing." Chen puts down the toaster but does not look any less displeased at the bad news. "If we really want a baby-"

"Kittens," Chen says very pointedly.

" _Kitten!_ " Lu Han says loudly to continue getting his point across. "Then we adopt or something."

"Do we do that on the couch?" Chen asks and Lu Han is glad he hasn't actually started cooking because whatever it was he was making (eggs?) would be burning right now. "No, we don't do adoption on the couch," he says slowly and sighing. "We do it like, uh, like how Junmyeon brought you home."

"In a box?" Chen asks and now looking even more confused. "I don't know how I feel about mating in a box."

"I mean he took you from a place and gave you a home with a family and stuff and that's adoption," Lu Han finishes before Chen comes up with more completely incorrect things. 

"But then it's not our kitten," Chen says, frowning as he leans against the counter.

"It's kind of our kitten." Lu Han is now referring to a potential human child he will raise as a 'kitten'. Lu Han is in a serious so far long-term relationship with a previous cat. There have been stranger things he has dealt with and done. None that he will admit to openly though. "Well, it would kind of be our kitten. In that it would see us as it's parents but not actually..." This is all very complicated. 

"Can we get thirteen kittens?" Chen asks and at this point Lu Han is about ready to just say 'yes' just to get the stupid topic to stop so they can eat breakfast and he can have a day off to lounge around and be 'unproductively productive.' " _Yes_ ," Lu Han decides as a last course of action, grabbing a spatula and gesturing with it in emphasis. "We can get thirteen fucking kittens and have a family of fifteen and you know what? I don't even care, you turned from a cat to a human maybe you can have kittens. I give the fuck up."

Chen is giving him one of his grins that is both predatory and seductive and Lu Han doesn't think they'll be having breakfast after all today. Maybe brunch though as Chen steps forward and immediately nestles up to him, wrapping his arms around Lu Han's waist and pressing firmly against him, smiling as he leans up and aligns himself at that perfect angle where he can maneuver to wedge Lu Han's thigh between his own. "I love you," he purrs, slipping fingers up the back of Lu Han's shirt and scraping his nails lightly over the base area of Lu Han's spine. "I love you, lots."

"You just want me to put kittens in you," Lu Han grumbles.

"Thirteen kittens," Chen says with that low growl in his throat that he discovered makes Lu Han groan and grab him really hard. Like he does now, wrapping his arms around Chen's waist, spatula still in hand to pull him hard against him.

"What if it's only twelve?" Lu Han asks, leaning in to ghost his mouth over Chen's and feeling the familiar heat that begins to crawl from the gut of his stomach through him as he flicks his wrist and smacks Chen sharply on the ass. With the spatula.

The small whine that curls from Chen's throat as he rocks forward and slips his hands down the backs of Lu Han's sweatpants is nothing but further incentive for Lu Han to lean down just that short distance and claim his mouth. Chen opens to him immediately, and the hands that knead into the base of his spine has Lu Han delivering another sharp slap with the spatula and Chen ruts hard into him, a sharp inhale and, okay, breakfast can wait.

Electing to keep the spatula (for potential future use), Lu Han allows Chen to take over, rocking against him, pushing and pulling in the kiss as Lu Han holds him firmly to him, breath picking up as Chen begins a steady rhythm of rocking against him. The steady pressure and stimulation as well as the all too familiar need that they both seem to share works them both to panting. 

Chen shoves Lu Han's shirt up his body with one hand and shoves his sweatpants down with the other, the elastic stretching awkwardly around his thighs and revealing Lu Han's extremely convenient habit of not wearing underpants anymore. Chen, wiggling from one of Lu Han's slightly larger shirt and reduced to boxers, nearly sticks himself to Lu Han, hands running over his body as his mouth attaches to the strong lines of his chest.

Lu Han makes it his very important job of keeping him very steady by the hips, panting and softly voicing his approval in soft breathless moans. Chen licks and sucks at his skin, Lu Han keeping one hand gripping firmly at Chen's hip as the other moves to tangle in the dark hair and scratch, earning a low whine as Chen rolls against him hard.

"Not here," Lu Han tells him, thinking that as much as he would love to fuck Chen on the kitchen counter like they did last month, Junmyeon is theoretically home and might prove to be an unwelcome distraction. Body hot, skin prickling already with arousal as his heart pounds in assistance, Lu Han pushes Chen off. Sliding his hands up to gently cup at his face, tilting it up and kissing him firmly, long and lingering, Lu Han tells Chen without words (as he knows is the best communication when Chen wants to 'mate') to hold on, they're getting there. 

Unfortunately, as Lu Han struggles to walk competently with his sweatpants around his thighs from the kitchen and pull Chen with him for the practical destination of the bedroom, Chen seems to have other ideas. Yanking him back against himself and letting out a low growl, teeth sinking possessively into the skin at the juncture of Lu Han's neck and shoulder, making him let out a gasp, Chen quickly slides his hands down Lu Han's front. His hands slide over his hips and down to press hard into the area that is anywhere but Lu Han's actual mostly hard cock, bared and proud and standing, just saying 'hello' as it tends to do. 

Lu Han moans, wondering what on earth Chen has on his mind as he feels the other's own cock straining against his ass, trapped behind the thin layer of boxers but clearly insistent as it's owner as Chen teases but doesn't touch, circling just around Lu Han's base as he bites along Lu Han's shoulder. Reaching back and grabbing Chen by the hips firmly, Lu Han tries to turn, to frown and tell him 'no' they have to not do this in a common area when Chen says "Mine" and shoves Lu Han back.

Stumbling in shock Lu Han barely has a second to catch himself on the edge of one of the kitchen chairs before Chen is on him, grabbing him by the shoulders and shoving him down, climbing into his lap and kissing him hard. Mouth hot and panting as his fingers twine into Lu Han's hair and pull hard, Chen is tugging him back and Lu Han's hands immediately come up to grip at Chen's hips, those amazing slim and talented hips that are currently pressing Chen's cock into his stomach insistently as he tries to seal their mouths. 

"Chen," Lu Han tries to warn, the serious note in his voice dropping uselessly when Chen tugs his hair again and bites his lip hard, a growl low in his throat before he pulls away, eyes locking with Lu Han for a moment. They're dark, as dark as ever, and accompanied by a satisfied smirk before he's shifting, sliding down and his hands slip down Lu Han's already overheating skin, sliding down skin.

Lu Han simply raises his eyebrows as he lets him move, his own hands dragging over Chen's back and shoulders before Chen is on his knees, fingers curling to pull Lu Han's sleep sweatpants off. He grins as Lu Han kicks them off easily, his own mouth curving in a smile. No man says no to a blowjob.

"You know, if you suck me off that isn't going to make you pregnant," Lu Han points out, breaths making his chest rise and fall impressively. Chen's hands slowly push his thighs apart, settling himself between them before sliding them to smooth over Lu Han's stomach. He leans in and nips gently at Lu Han's hip, massaging gently as his hands slide up Lu Han's stomach and he leans his head on Lu Han's thigh.

"I know, but that doesn't mean you don't enjoy it," he says with a grin. He does have a point. "Or I don't enjoy it," he adds and Lu Han lets out a faster exhale than he might have intended as Chen's breath, hot, ghosts over him.

"Just making sure," Lu Han says and ends in a long moan as Chen’s tongue flicks to drag over the sensitive head of his cock. He takes in another shudder of a breath, eyes on Chen as his lover slowly drags his tongue over his erection, hands squeezing gently at Lu Han’s thighs, kneading in tandem. “You’ve gotten so good at this.”

“Of course, I have,” Chen says, speaking along the side of Lu Han’s dick as he nuzzles down to the base. Lu Han’s hips jerk. “What else did you expect?”

Lu Han might reply with something along the lines of “experimental rimming” but instead chooses to let out a moan when Chen mouths at his balls, hand curling easily around his cock and slowly pumping him. One hand finding it’s way into Chen’s hair and rifling through it, Lu Han watches as Chen’s makes himself very at home between his legs, breath stuttering as that warm wet tongue laves at him. His arousal is heavy in his body, drinking in the sight of Chen.

The coil of arousal builds as Chen shifts his attention from Lu Han’s balls back to his cock, slipping the tip into his mouth, glistening slightly and pulling a soft moan from Lu Han. One hand curled around Lu Han’s base, Chen watches as Lu Han goes vaguely limp in the chair as he takes him slowly into his mouth, head bobbing leisurely.

“Fuck,” Lu Han says intelligently as he pushes back Chen’s hair from his face, breaths too shirt in his chest as Chen looks up at him oh so dark and the effort of not fucking straight down Chen’s throat is immense. “Fuck,” Lu Han says again, continuing on his excellent praise for Chen.

Chen, amazingly, manages to smile somehow around his dick and just sucks him down deeper, his hot wet mouth a perfect slick friction with that curling tongue to make Lu Han groan a little too loud. Chen’s nails are digging into his thigh, the hunger in his eyes making Lu Han far too hot (though the blowjob certain helps too) as that spectacular mouth sucks him closer to release.

“Just so you’re aware,” Lu Han pants, watching as Chen alternates between long torturous drags of his mouth down to the rapid bobs and light flicks of his tongue to the underside of Lu Han’s cock. “I’m about two seconds from coming in your mouth.”

“Giving me cream?” Chen asks, pulling his mouth off with a small pop, a string of saliva connecting his bottom lip with the crown of Lu Han’s dick. The raise of his eyebrow has Lu Han groaning, tilting his head back as he strains to ward off his release, Jongdae’s hand stroking him teasingly. “Are you that close?”

“Well,” Lu Han almost continues but instead bites his lip. Calm down, because breakfast isn’t going to happen until Chen has had his way and fucked Lu Han until neither of them can walk properly.

At least that’s what the nails digging into his hips say.

Before Lu Han can answer though with a comprehensive answer, Chen is pulling up, releasing Lu Han’s extremely sensitive cock and draping himself into Lu Han’s lap with his extremely tantalizing feline finesse. Licking into Lu Han’s mouth, he winds his arms around Lu Han’s neck and melds them together, rolling his hips forward to press his clear arousal into Lu Han’s stomach in suggestion that he has needs as well.

“Lu Han,” Chen whines gently, teeth tugging at Lu Han’s lower lip as Lu Han’s hands easily find his ass, fingers digging into the tender flesh. He whines again, hips jerking forward as he shivers slightly and his fingers bury into Lu Han’s hair. “Lu Han, please.”

“Well, since you asked nicely,” Lu Han says, though Chen could have just said “toaster” and he’d have done pretty much whatever. Chen whimpers around Lu Han’s fingers and then whines as he mouths down Lu Han’s neck, Lu Han’s fingers slipping into his ass and past the ring of muscle. Hips still rolling, Chen rocks back, pushing Lu Han’s fingers deeper with soft little gasping moans against Lu Han’s throat that go straight to his cock.

Vaguely, in the back of his mind, Lu Han remembers they’re on kitchen chair and Junmyeon is home. Then Chen is reaching behind himself and grabbing Lu Han’s cock, pushing himself up with his free hand on Lu Han’s shoulder.

“You’re not-“ Lu Han beings, fingers still just barely three deep in Chen’s ass.

“It’s okay,” Chen says, shaking his head and leaning in swiftly to kiss him. “I want it, I want you, I want this.” He kisses Lu Han again, the need and arousal that Lu Han can feel pumping through him reflecting in the urgent press of lips. “For the kittens,” Chen says into Lu Han’s mouth.

“Oh for fuck’s sa-“ Lu Han ends in a low moan as Chen sinks back, pressing the crow of Lu Han’s cock past the rim of his ass. “Shit,” Lu Han says instead, hands back to grip at Chen’s ass, guiding him as Chen sinks to settle with Lu Han’s cock fully buried inside of him.

Chen doesn’t really give much time for adjustment, arms tightening about Lu Han’s shoulders as he shifts, lifting up and moaning, Lu Han echoing him as the hot feeling of his ass pulls delicious over his cock. Chen rocks back, just as he reaches to nearly the tip of Lu Han’s cock, before taking him in again, and the slow pace has Lu Han groaning, fingers holding firm to the curvature of Chen’s ass in his palms.

“Fuck, Chen,” Lu Han pants as Chen rocks back, hips rolling as he pants hot to the side of Lu Han’s jaw. Chen just moans, mouth peppering as he takes Lu Han’s cock inside of him again and again, his own cock trapped between them and pressing periodically into Lu Han’s stomach, painting it with precum.

Lu Han, already brought close by the blowjob earlier, is not far off from coming for all he’s worth into Chen’s ass very soon, the hastening pace of Chen’s hips making sure of it, and he abandons one asscheek to wrap his hand around Chen’s cock. Chen bites him, teeth sinking hard into his neck as he lets out a soft growl, hips jerking harsher as Lu Han begins to pump him quickly.

The chair squeaks, almost comically, as Chen bounces down on his cock, his high whines into Lu Han’s throat rising to a peak as Lu Han feels the tightening in his groin, signifying release. “Chen,” he gets out before he rolls his hips hard, fucking deep and getting a high whine as he comes, Chen still fucking down onto him and taking him through his orgasm as Lu Han’s hand pumps hastily over Chen’s cock, slick with precum.

Panting, and with Chen rutting into his hand, Lu Han rides out his own orgasm, the rushing warmth and tingling heightened as Chen shivers and shakes in his arms, finally crying out and coming into his hands.

Panting into skin, Lu Han rests his head against Chen’s, feeling stick and gross and very satisfied with the morning.

Pressing a soft kiss to the side of Chen’s head, he sighs as Chen shifts, turning to meet him and kiss him properly. “Happy?” Lu Han asks, slowly and blurred with afterglow nice things.

“One down,” Chen says groggily and Lu Han hums blearily before he registers what Chen has _just said_.

“What?” he asks, eyes opening to take in Chen’s fiendishly curling smile and the way his eyes glint. Hungry. “Breakfast,” Lu Han says, firmly and asserting control. He still has his spatula after all.

“Shower,” Chen says, smile still curling and Lu Han has a vague suspicion he shouldn’t trust it.

The problem is Chen’s temptation usually overrules Lu Han’s basic instincts like survival.

“Then brunch,” Lu Han affirms, giving Chen a pointed look.

“And then more mating,” Chen agrees, leaning in easily to lick up Lu Han’s cheek with a hot tongue.

“How about a nap?” Lu Han proposes into Chen’s neck, letting out a soft groan as Chen pulls up off his lap and tugs at him. “I like naps. Today was going to be a nap day.”

“Shower,” Chen says, pointed pulling at Lu Han with a significant look that says ‘now or someone will be hit’. “Lu Han.”

The shower ends up being a ploy. Lu Han realizes this as soon as he gets into the bathroom and Chen ensures that they’re both very completely naked before he’s kissing Lu Han again, slow and sensual enough that he is extremely distracting and enticing, getting Lu Han half hard again before he proceeds to turn and grind his ass against Lu Han’s cock.

“This was very rude,” Lu Han says pointedly as he pushes Chen back against the sink and looks him in the eye.

“If rude means a great idea, then yes,” Chen is panting, breaths hot and fast as his eyes are even hungrier, hips rocking to Lu Han’s and pressing their cocks together with expectant intent. “I’m extremely rude.”

Lu Han doesn’t even bother correcting him as he hoists him up, Chen’s legs immediately wrapping around his hips and arms around his neck. Stretched and rolling his hips, Chen lets out a soft sigh ending in a high whine as Lu Han slides in, using the sink to balance as he pushes inside.

“Are you okay?” Lu Han asks, Chen’s thighs tightening around his waist.

“Fuck, yes,” Chen gasps, and tucks closer, fingernails digging into Lu Han’s shoulders. “Move.” Lu Han doesn’t need telling twice, system already sensitive from the earlier round in the kitchen as Chen rocks and lets out soft little moans, his ass slick and Lu Han’s cock slipping faster and easier. The angle has him pressing in deep, his cock hitting almost every time over Chen’s prostate and dissolving him quickly into gasping pants, random choice profanity (most of which isn’t really profanity) dropping from Chen’s mouth as Lu Han struggles to keep from potentially breaking the sink.

“Cats, yes,” Chen almost wails as Lu Han shifts and hoists one leg slightly higher. A second later Chen lets out a yelp as he slips and Lu Han only just catches him before the both have to stagger back, Lu Han slipping out as he keeps them both from cracking their skulls. “No,” Chen whines, almost trembling as he pulls at Lu Han, turning and placing his hands over the sink, bending with legs spread and ass bared, looking over his shoulder at Lu Han. “Don’t stop.”

Hardly one to deny Chen when he’s this needy (which has consequences), Lu Han positions himself and slips his hands back to Chen’s waist, pressing a kiss to the nape of Chen’s neck as the tip of his cock nudges Chen’s twitching asshole. “Lu Han, please,” Chen whines, arching his back and pushing back in an attempt to fit Lu Han’s cock back inside of him.

Lu Han, rather than speaking, bites down at the nape of Chen’s neck, getting a loud garbled cry as he thrusts forward, pressing deep and direct into Chen’s body where he knows will get him shaking. Chen’s fingers go white around the porcelain basin as he jerks, letting out another cry as Lu Han resumes his previous pace, pushing both of them with building breaths and loudening moans back towards release.

“Lu Han, I'm going to cum,” Chen gasps out, almost trembling below him, voice tight amid it’s breathiness and Lu Han laves his tongue over the bite mark once more.

“Okay,” Lu Han tells him, hot and his hips already losing rhythm again, sloppy much faster as his second orgasm barrels in hard. “Me too.”

“Bite me,” Chen gasps and Lu Han blinks, almost not believing what he’s heard until Chen repeats it, louder this time.

So Lu Han does, a sharp bite in the exact same place and Chen convulses with a yell, arching hard into him as the walls of his ass spasm and clamp down around Lu Han’s still thrusting cock. The pressure and clenching around his cock has Lu Han pulled apart swiftly, coming for a second time with a growl in Chen’s plaint form, letting out soft sighing whimpers under him.

Lu Han is careful not to collapse on his lover, holding Chen steady against him, panting himself and feeling limbless but the gasps of Chen and soft whimpers are enough to tell him Chen is just as spent. Slipping out has both of them groaning, and Lu Han swallows at the slick mess that slips down Chen’s thighs.

“Okay?” Lu Han asks, pulling Chen up an to him, wrapping his arms around him. Chen blinks sleepily at him, content and still foggy before he smiles, snuggling into Lu Han’s arms and wrapping into him, nuzzling at Lu Han’s neck.

“Hmm,” Chen hums in affirmation, nudging against the hollow of his throat. He still is mostly attached to Lu Han when he navigates them both into the bath, curled up to his chest and only blearily protesting when Lu Han insists they have to be washed. He whimpers as Lu Han’s fingers nudge against his ass, intent on cleaning him out before Chen stiffens and fixes him with a look.

“Don’t,” he says, frowning at him pointedly.

“Chen,” Lu Han tries to be firm.

“No, it has to stay there,” Chen insists, and pulls Lu Han’s hand away. “Or no kittens.”

Lu Han thunks his head against the back of the shower wall. “We’re still on kittens,” he tells the ceiling. “He wants to have kittens.”

The ceiling offers no sympathy.

“I want to have _your_ kittens,” Chen tells him, wiggling up his chest and poking at one of his nipples in absent curiosity.

“My kittens,” Lu Han corrects himself to the ceiling. It listens very well despite it's lack of compassion.

“Thirteen of them,” Chen reminds, absently blowing on Lu Han’s nipple and poking it as it stiffens. “They’ll be adorable,” he coos before flicking his tongue over the now stiff nub.

Running his hands through Chen’s wet hair, Lu Han pulls his head back to look at him. “I love you,” he tells Chen very seriously. “Very much.”

“I know,” Chen tells him, smiling. “I love you, too.”

“Good,” Lu Han says, sighing and sinking a bit further into the tub. He raising a brow. “You know I’d love you even if you don't have kittens.”

“Yes,” Chen says, going back to absently poking at Lu Han’s nipple. His apparent new favorite play toy of the immediate moment. “And I guess I’ll like you still if we can’t have thirteen.”

“Oh?” Lu Han asks, cocking an eyebrow.

“Ten is alright too,” Chen says, and when he looks up at Lu Han his mouth is curved p in that tempting feline way that Lu Han is so used to.

Lu Han gives up, instead just letting Chen lean up and kiss him instead of arguing with him about the semantics of same sex procreation. Mostly in that the success rate is zero.

Chen is content though, wrapping around him and curling up beside him as they share a breakfast/brunch plate on the couch before Chen decides to ride him on it.

By the time Chen finally lets Lu Han go to bed, Lu Han is very much exhausted. “I don't even want you touching my penis,” Lu Han grumbles into the mattress, boneless as Chen crawls on top of him and snuggles down.

“Well, not again tonight,” Chen murmurs into his ear, kissing it gently and the briefest flare of appreciation sparks in Lu Han’s gut. “I’m too tired.”

“Oh, well, I’m glad you’ve been thoroughly worn out then,” Lu Han grunts and Chen thumps him on the back before worming his way into his arms, curling up into Lu Han’s chest and tucking his head under Lu Han’s chin. Lu Han sighs as Chen wraps around him, their legs tangling.

“Ten kittens,” Lu Han mumbles, feeling heavy just with the idea.

“Or you,” Chen murmurs sleepily. “I’m always happiest with just you.”

Lu Han lets out a soft chuckle. “You always have me,” he tells Chen, pressing a soft kiss before fading to sleep.

The next morning, Lu Han wakes up to Chen shoving him literally out of bed.

“Ow,” Lu Han tells the floor very pointedly, grimacing. “Why would you do that?” he says to the floor but actually asks Chen.

“You were heavy,” Chen tells him and then rolls out of bed taking most of the blankets with him, tugging Lu Han into them with him. Lu Han is still too tired and limp from the day previous to protest much, letting Chen spoon him easily.

“Happy fools of April,” Chen says to Lu Han’s neck.

Lu Han stiffens.

“What?”

“Fools of April,” Chen mumbles at Lu Han’s neck still, sounding sleepily satisfied with himself. “You know, where people lie to each other because it’s funny.”

Lu Han wants to hit something. “Who told you about that?”

“Sehun,” Chen tells him succinctly. Lu Han is going to murder Junmyeon’s horrible twinkboy.

“Sehun,” Lu Han repeats darkly.

“It’s a strange human thing,” Chen tells him, hands petting down Lu Han’s stomach. “Aren’t you proud of me?”

“For giving me panic attacks about kittens?” Lu Han asks, rolling over in Chen’s arms and frowning at him. This wasn’t funny. This also isn’t how April Fools works. Especially when it’s nearly the end of November. Lu Han may have to kill Sehun slowly and painfully and with many knives of various size.

“It was a very funny joke. I was hysterical,” Chen tells him with brightness in his eyes. “You’re a very good mate.”

“You have no idea,” Lu Han grumbles as Chen grins and kisses him. Lu Han lets him, because in the end, Chen does mostly get what he wants.

Except kittens.


End file.
